What's Your Midlife Meltdown Mode? Find Out Now!
Your body's a stranger And your brain will.not.shut.up.
At midlife, your hormones, nervous system and brain can team up to make you pull your hair out (which is unfortunate since it's probably already falling out on it's own).
Midlife is a mindfuck for many women. Is it perimenopause? ADHD? Existential dread over the world today? Whatever it is, it's frustrating and feels very lonely.
Let's figure it all out together. I'm that friend who follows the experts, digests the information, and relays it back with humor and insight, so you can get some damn peace without becoming a data scientist on the side.
LAUGH. LEARN. RAGE. REPEAT. Trust me...it's a great survival strategy.
What's Your Midlife Meltdown Mode?
Finally, a quiz that doesn't tell you to drink more water and manifest peace.
Discover your default meltdown mode (spiraler, isolator, or chaos enthusiast) and get bite-sized strategies to survive chaotic brain and out of control body, without guilt, homework, or hashtags.
Enter your email to get instant results and a few coping tips that actually work.
Just talking to [Kimberly] is like, fun and comforting and warm and happy.
Lindsey W.
Let's Focus on Feeling Better and Save the Diagnosis for Later (or Never)
1
release the pressure
We don’t bottle things up, waiting for the explosion. Whatever the issue, we mock it, rage about it, and question it later, all without judgment, homework, or need to explain ourselves. We say the things we’ve been dying to say because letting it out is therapeutic (and might just make you snort loud enough to startle your pets).
2
interrupt the spiral
Constant obsessing has never solved a problem. When you're stuck there, you need a pattern interrupt. Sometimes you need a real laugh or a good cry. Jumping jacks or a quick walk can do it. A loud "oh, hell no” or "nope, not today" could suffice. Fantasizing about felonies might be fun. As long as the doomscrolling stops, it's a win.
3
remember who you are
Midlife can be chaotic but the things that make you you never change. You're still funny, even if you can't find the right words sometimes. You're still smart even if loud noises make it impossible to think. You're still loving and compassionate, even if your tolerance for stupid people has left the building.
Hey. I'm Kimberly.
my midlife worldview
There’s no one way to do midlife “right” but there are a ton of ways it can go wrong. What you’re feeling is real and if you want/need help working through it, make it a priority. Go see a dozen specialists until you find one who doesn’t dismiss you. Have every blood test on the menu if that will put your mind at ease. See a therapist. Try a new medication. Pick just one thing from the list, do all of the above, or just find a friend who will sit with you, reassure you that you are not alone, and say something silly just to see your beautiful smile. You are not alone and do not need to suffer in silence.
Sanity, Served With Insight and Sarcasm
I’m not a guru, therapist, doctor, or productivity coach. I’m just an inquisitive smart-ass with a heart, figuring out our brains, our bodies, and this dumpster fire of a world right alongside you.
I have ADHD, a body that thinks perimenopause should continue into my sixties, and a heart that fears every single news cycle. I spot hypocrisy, notice patterns, and anticipate outcomes that many people never even consider. My work lives at the intersection of compassion, midlife chaos, and gallows humor, all usually served with snacks.
Let’s work together to reclaim our sense of self, sanity, and humor in this world that’s clearly lost the plot.
the cranky cupcake (Merch)
When words fail, wear them. Snarky, soft, and 100% relatable, these tees and sweatshirts get it all out of your head without explanations or backlash. Sarcasm sold separately but strongly encouraged.
YOu've missed the point (podcast) -- Coming Soon
With equal parts humor, insight, and midlife truth bombs, this podcast will help you better understand WTF is going on and feel a little less alone in the chaos. No more pretending everything is fine and then blowing up because he's chewing again.
Join the waitlist and get a special shoutout when we launch!
Midlife Madness (Facebook Group)
A safe, sweary, judgement-free zone for midlife women who just need an escape from the madness. Real talk, shared laughter, and a little education, surrounded by people who GET IT. It's the community you didn't realize you were missing.
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